Dear Rowan, September 1 St. Louis
After my first day on the road, life
is looking up again! What a wonderful feeling to be free of that job and that
apartment and to know that I never ever have to go back to either one. The job
offered me a leave of absence, apparently they know that their employees feel
more like cattle in a slaughter yard than people, and need to walk away from
the job for weeks or months at a time or they will snap or crumble. Apparently,
while they do nothing to actively make their employees lives better, either a
verbal explosion or a weeping pile of depression that used to be a person
occurring in the middle of the call floor is not something they want other
employees to witness more than once a week (maybe they think we will spook and stampede for the doors).
Thus they offer time away from hell to see what the real world is like and
regain a sense of self respect before plunging back into the cave of cubicles
that reek of human despair. As I told you before, I just quit. I do not want
the gloom of impending re-damnation hanging over me, even if they were to give
me leave of absence for a whole year.
Today I packed up all my stuff into
the back of my car, turned in the keys for my little dungeon, and took to the
open road. My destination, at least for a week or two, is St. Louis, MO. The
drive took all day, but I was in no hurry, other than to gain some distance
between myself and Wichita. I headed north first, up through Kansas City, then
east over to St. Louis. I stopped in Kansas City for lunch and a little sightseeing.
The country around Kansas City is just as flat as Wichita, but the city itself
seems more alive and modern. I didn't stay very long, as I was looking for a
place that didn't remind me of Wichita, even if it was more appealing. I had
lunch at a place I found online called Fiorella's Jack Stack BBQ that has a
really good Zagat rating and decent prices. I was a little dubious since it
sounds like it should be an italian/BBQ fusion, but it was actually really
good. And yes, I did have ribs. At a BBQ joint in the heart of America, would
you expect anything less of me? After lunch it was straight back onto the
interstate headed for St. Louis. I may go back to Kansas City someday when I don't hold resentment to it simply for being within driving distance of Wichita.
St. Louis is a terrifying place to
drive into. The outskirts of the city are dotted with empty, abandoned,
decrepit buildings. It feels like a plague has come through and left buildings
with no one alive to care for them. Or maybe the zombie apocalypse has already
started and no one knows, because it started in St. Louis and it is eating all
the people from the outskirts into the central city and no one escaped to warn
the rest of the world yet. Even in the heart of downtown St. Louis, within
walking distance of the iconic (and amazingly, disturbingly, mind bogglingly
gigantic) arch, there are abandoned, crumbling buildings wedged between fully
functional, apparently thriving businesses. I expected to see contamination
signs across the doors to warn people away and explain these rotten teeth in
the skyline of the city. But there seems to be no explanation except neglect
and ennui. The problem with these now uninhabitable buildings is that their
owners gave up on them and moved away, but no one bought them so now no one
wants the bother of either tearing them down or fixing them up, so they sit
hollow, with boarded up windows or gaping holes in the upper stories where
windows used to be. It feels like the city is dying just because no one cares, and
they will just sit and watch it rot until they think it is hurting their own
profits, then they will just move away and leave another rotten tooth to
crumble into decay and drag the city further down. Its sad, really. I found
an amazing little Indian restaurant with the greatest dessert naan I have ever
had. It was naan stuffed with raisins and coconuts, and pistachios, and dusted
with cinnamon and sugar, and they served honey with it to drizzle onto it for a
little added sweetness. There was also an apparently thriving arts district,
because the streets were crowded with people either coming from or going
to shows, and some people that had
apparently just come out of one show and were going to another, from what I
gathered from shamelessly eavesdropping while loitering around the crowds on
the sidewalk. How else was I supposed to find out what there was to do in town?
I did not go to a show tonight though. After my escape from Wichita and a full
day on the road, I was just ready to find a bed and not wake up for a day or
two.
I discovered that the US has hostels
today. Somehow I had always thought of hostels as a European thing. But there
are quite a few hostels in St. Louis, and you can even get a private room.
Normally dorming would be fine with me, but after the day I have had, I wanted
a little alone-but-not-driving time. Besides, it was late when I finally found
the hostel, and I did not think that dorm mates would appreciate me staying up
to write a letter, or creeping in in the middle of the night after having
stayed up in the main room writing. So private room it is, for tonight at
least. The "hostel" I found with private rooms is actually a Motel 6,
but its rooms go for $21 a night, so I might look into a real hostel tomorrow.
I know there is a youth hostel somewhere in St. Louis, but it was late and I
did not want to hunt around and try to find it tonight, I just wanted a bed.
Speaking of beds, the old bat of a
landlord in Wichita bought the mattress from me that I got when I moved in, and
she bought it for the same price that I bought it for, seeing as it was nearly
brand new. I also did not tell her what I bought it for, and gave her an
inflated price which she then haggled down, but the price we settled on was
just about the price I got it for, rounding up to a flat dollar amount of
course. And she paid me in cash, so I don't have to worry about a check
bouncing or anything.
I think I will stay in St. Louis for
a few days, maybe a week, then head north again to Chicago. I want to make it
over to Salem, Mass. for Halloween. From what I have been able to find online,
it looks like they do a rather amazing city wide blowout, and if that doesn't
get me a candy fix for a few weeks (or maybe months) I don't know what will.
If you know about, or have opinions
about, any of the cities between Chicago and Salem, let me know. I am going to
be driving along I-90 (as far as I can tell from the maps), so I will be up for
exploring any place between Chicago and Boston. There are no hostels in Salem,
I already looked, so I think I will find a place to stay in Boston and then
drive up to Salem for Halloween.
Once I finally get up tomorrow, I
plan on beginning to explore St. Louis. I have to go up in the arch of course,
and the travel book says there is an underground museum beneath it that I will
go down and see. I also read that they have a dome with a year round rainforest
inside, so I really want to go see that. I wonder if they have animals in their
rain forest or just plants. The guide does not really specify, but I think it
is just plants. It is inside the botanical garden, which I guess used to belong
to a hardware baron, and he willed it to the city when he died. I will also
need to go spend at least a day at the St. Louis zoo, as I do love big
well-funded zoos. Little zoos always make me sad, but big ones with nice
enclosures for the animals are calming to me. Plus I need to take several
walking trips around the city to see any fun buildings or stores. And I will
need to drive out to any places that come to my attention as interesting but
are out of walking range.
Do you have any suggestions for
must-do or must-see places or things in St. Louis? It would be so fun if you
could come out and go on this Grand Tour of mine with me, but at least I will
get to see you for New Year's when I come to New York. Are you still at the
same job, or did someone finally notice your rather amazing talent and hire you
away from the coffee shop? Or there is always the possibility of a wonderfully
handsome and wealthy young man coming into your Park Avenue coffee shop,
falling madly in love with you at fist sight, and sweeping you off to his
penthouse. But the finding-a-better-job idea seems more likely, even in New
York. And that way I would not have to be wildly jealous of you, either. If you
did end up in your own happily-ever-after New York fairytale it would certainly
inspire at least a short period of jealousy. But in all seriousness, I hop life
is treating you well in whatever you are doing, and I look forward to hearing from
you soon. You don't have to tell me that I have gone insane though, that is
already a well established point by now.
Your Friend,
Emily
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